My favourite barista won my heart today

My favourite coffe shop is right outside my home office. The coffe is great but not better than at other places. The best thing about this coffeshop is the barista....or whatever he deserves to be called.

Once upon a time I asked for a heart decoration on top of my cup but the barista failed utterly. Last week he did this attempt.

To me it is a really beautiful garlic. On top of my coffee.

Today he came with this cup to my table.

This time I could trace the shape of a heart.

I heard him grumble in the kitchen and a few mnutes later he arrived with this one.

But the best part was his lovely smile.

I presume he never got any education as barista. But he surely has the happiest smile and the friendliest approach among all coffee shops I ever seen. I wonder what happens if I wish a leaf next time....hmmmm...let me try that next week....

Playing with light and shutterspeed

In all these pictures I am experimenting with long exposure time and a short flashlight. It may look like double exposure but isn´t. It is fun and I find it very creative but it is hard since very often the motive moves out of the frame during the exposure time. When I succeed I find it catch the dance much better than ordinary flashlight pictures.

Bachata - a very close dance

Salsa is more extrovert

More bachata

A salsa dip I presume, The couple actually moved out of the frame but the dip in right position made a great picture

Some look almost normal despite my little games. Bachata.

Oh where did he go? Stupid man, I can never trust my partners

Girl bachata

The black panther is dipping his lady (one of my fav dance partners)

I like this picture because of the blue dress to the red background.

There are many spooky pictures a night like this one. I really like this one despite missing lower parts. The laughters are there and contact between leader and follower (one of my other favs by the way)

If you care to follow my creative work join my fan page at Facebook Bettina Braesch-Andersen´s creations. I will show pictures, videos and perhaps even some watercolour. Sometimes I add friends work there too.

Remember to say hi at the wall when you join. And please comment as much as you want too :)

Transition management - to get through the transit hall

My bus was late to the railway station so I had to wait 25 minutes for the next one. I went to Espresso house to get a few quality minutes with myself this very depressing morning. I saw the train for Öresund leaving and I recalled one stupid memory - a hope of a meeting and a nice cup of coffee.

I need dreams to manage life right now. Dreams as escapism. Dreams as drivers & motivators. Without dreams I am like a fish stranded on the beach. I struggle to get new dreams. I really engage myself in 'here & now' things to make me feel good. I do enjoy current life - I have heaps of fun. I meet people who makes me feel really good. I improve at the gym. I am finally "defeating gravity" thanks to gym results. Dance is improving as well.

But still I am in a transit hall. I have been there for over two years. Dreams became my way of managing the pain and breathing in the vacuum.

I need dreams and I want to know when to give up the old ones because then I need to create a new one. Impatiences is one of my characteristics and probably charm as well. And I truly am a person who prefer to say good bye before starting up new projects & dreams.

To start up something new something else has to end
I was at a great lecture in transition management last week. These theories is about the human side of organizational changes but they are all easily applied to private life as well.

Quotes from Strategies for managing change, Professor William  Bridges and Transition Management theory

"William Bridges' theory involves a three-phase process of:

1. Ending, Losing, Letting Go - helping people deal with their tangible and intangible losses and mentally prepare to move on
2. The Neutral Zone - critical psychological realignments and repatterning takes place. This is all about helping get people through it, and capitalising on all the confusion by encouraging them to be innovators
3. The New Beginning - helping people develop the new identity, experience the new energy, and discover the new sense of purpose that make the change begin to work."

One a-ha moment was when we spoke about reasons not to change and not saying goodbye to the past. If you not say good-bye you never reach the Neutral zone and will be late for next phase.

Some reasons may be:

1. People tend to dislike changes
2. People have other targets for the moment - busy in life with other agendas
3. People do not understand the idea/message and its consequence
4. People do not trust the one who is delivering the message
5. People are afraid losing something (socially, power, friends etc)

That day gave me a lot to think about (thoughtful as I am very often now a days).

I am not sure if I should give up that old dream of that special cup of coffee. Not yet. But I will try to replace it by a new one.

Preferably involving travels far away.
Preferably on firmer grounds than previous stupid ones.
Together with a friend or alone - I do not know yet.
New York, Montreal.or Cuba - I do not know yet.

Time will tell me. I know.
I am a fatalist whenever it suits me

 

Are you sapiosexual?

Are you easily turned on by other peoples intelligence? Do you get sexually attracted by smart men or women? You might be sapiosexual. Put your spectacles on and read now...

I learnt that word at Facebook this week and I saw that many more had the same intuitive interpretation as me  - but was it the right one? Today I looked that word up at Google and found a blog - Sapiosexual

"I want an incisive, inquisitive, insightful, irreverent mind. I want someone for whom philosophical discussion is foreplay. I want someone who sometimes makes me goouch due to their wit and evil sense of humor. I want someone that I can reach out and touch randomly. I want someone I can cuddle with.

So now I wonder - aren´t we all sapisoexual? Who will not print her/his name under that quote?

Then I found the translation at Urban dictionary - a treasure regarding none-academical English, slang and of course sexual words (almost every thing you look up at Urban dictionary also have a sexual meaning.....strange)

It said:

The attraction to the same or opposite sex based on the attraction of wisdom.

Liking any person, with out being sexually discriminative, because of their wisdom, smarts, and your shared learnings.

Urban dictionary´s translation

I decided to look for more information. I found a closed Facebookpage but I also found a collection of quotes:

Sapiosexual is a recently constructed word (neologism) that has come into common usage, particularly on social networking sites where people are self-identifying as sapiosexual. It is a concatenation of the latin root sapio- from sapiens meaning wise or intelligent (itself derived from sapere which means to taste, or rather, to discern) and the latin root -sexualis as it pertains to sexual preferences.

This is a rabbit....nothing else....

There are a few definitions to be found online, all with slight variations. Wikipedia currently redirects queries for sapiosexual to pansexual.

Sapiosexual - Turned on by Intelligence

More quotes from that collection:

"I am sapiosexual. I think geeks and nerds are sexy--I often want to rub my XXXX against their minds." -Kayar Silkenvoice

"I am a sapiosexual. I admit to being attracted to a cute face, or a sexy body, or a winning smile. But those things simply catch my eye. For someone to keep my attention requires the ability to uphold their side of a conversation." --luvnkisses

"Sapiosexuality is the idea that sapience is the single-most important determining factor in one’s sexual preferences. So one is first most attracted to someone who appears to be thoughtful, rational and grounded." --Iain

Sapiosexual - Turned on by Intelligence

A rabbit from this view....

Wikipedia defines Sapiosexual as pansexual  and here I think we comes to the "core of the poodle" as we say in Sweden.

Pansexuality (also referred to as omnisexuality or polysexuality)  refers to the potential for sexual attractions, sexual desire, romantic love, or emotional attraction, towards people of all gender identities and biological sexes. Self-identified pansexuals may refer to themselves as gender-blind—that gender and sex are insignificant or irrelevant in determining whether they will be sexually attracted to others. The Oxford English Dictionary writes that pansexuality "encompasses all kinds of sexuality; not limited or inhibited in sexual choice with regards to gender or activity."

Gender seems not relevant at all to a true sapiosexual..A kind of bisexuality?

No from his view I mean...

Anyhow  I like that word - sapiosexual - and I will use it defining my own preferences for the future. If that includes all ages and both sexes I will not tell you dear reader but I will now end with a true story. about what I then called the intellectual flirt - perhaps it was sapiosexuality.

I once was at Lofoten (Norway) painting watercolour for a week in September. The very last night we went to the local pub having some wine. It was raining and half storm. Raincoats and wellingtons was put into a big chest at the entrance just as natural as you would leave your umbrella. We girls sat down at a table. I had problem to reach my seat since the guy at the table behind me was too close. He let me in and smiled.

After a few minutes he knocked my shoulder and asked a question. I answered politely and returned to my friends. After about ten minutes he was back. I was a bit annoyed by then since we were in the middle of a conversation and he was not the kind of guy you look twice at. I answered his question and returned to my wine. And so it went on and on annoying me more and more....until I could see the beauty in the both hemispheres between his ears.

At the end of that night I was sitting at his table discussing everything on this earth and he was damn smart man. If that was sapiosexuality....I do not care. It was fun and I liked the fact that I could see this man¨s beauty and sexy soul behind the mask

 

Photos are form this summer´s exhibition at Pilane Burial grounds.
Judge Persson in the Judgemental Circle - a walk at Pilane buri al grounds 2011
Among the sheeps - a walk at Pilane Burial grounds, 2009

Distant workplace and another tragedy

08:30

This is extreme I know but I am working in my car at the motorway. Some where about 10 km away there is a truck on fire. Pew! Lots of business phone calls and some Powerpoints. Broadband modem is working once again - I'll send some mails soon.

It took me 3.5 hours to go to my office this morning. usually it takes no more than one hour. I arrived 11:30 and left for a business lunch at 12:30 - 14:30. I managed to work for about 2 of these hours on the motorway with my laptop squeezed between myself and the steering. When I just needed to roll a few meters the laptop stayed in that position - when I needed to roll a few hundred meters I put it aside.

At work I could catch up with what happened. One truck driver is dead - he died in the flames. He drove a car full with chemicals but they are not sure about what kind yet. The fires was so huge and so hot that the concrete was put on fire. The motorway will be closed at least until tomorrow. It will be a long drive home tonight for  me

http://www.gp.se/nyheter/bohuslan/1.740432-tankbilsforaren-avliden

Now I supposed to work the few remaining hours. Perhaps not the most efficient day in my life but I am pretty content any way. Today I have been in touch with all friends that are really important to me - it means more to me than a full day at work. And I had a really great lunch.

My thoughts are now about the family to the dead truck driver. God bless you all!

Autumn outdoor lunch

My view while eating a shrimp salad wrapped up in a poncho. It was me that was wrapped up - not the salad ;)

This is the park right beside my home office. A great place to escape to for solicitude or some sun.

Alone at the office as so very often. Not bored this day however - plenty  to do and plenty phone calls. Some nice some stressy - but it happens things even if I am alone.

The photographers dilemma

I have started to defeat the fact that I never am visible in photos since I always am the one carrying the camera. But it isn´t easy.

It gets too small ....

9 september - one year later

Me an my oldest one was at the graveyard this Friday - on year after that accident. I didn´t cry neither did my daughter. Not that day.

That grave yard always makes me feel welcomed. We counted to five persons we knew pretty well - all resting within 15 meters. But also the older parts of the grave yard feels friendly. I was thinking about buying a space for my family....it would be nice to have it close to Mona-Lisa.

At the harbour - Rovinj

Loading...

Luxoury days at a SPA

For the first time I ever we went for a conference - my team at work and the new boss 8my organization is pretty anorectic). We had two lovely days at a SPA at the coastline. Lots of fun & giving tasks to do, white wine in the bubble pool looking out over the sea and marvellous food. There was autumn in the air but never the less very joyful & relaxing.

Last thrembling hours

This is last weekend of my vacation. I cannot say it feels like four weeks. It feels like two. I have never been so busy ever any vacation.

The weather have bern lovely. Mostly sunny summer weather with few short showers. I have only watered the plants 4-5 times.

I sit about 50 meters from the sea. - that is if I am a bird. The step cliffs makes it a few hundred meters to climb down to sealevel. But it is worth it. A superfast lightweight motor boat is waiting there. Sadly water quality is as usual at this part of our country - Saltsjöbaden.

The cottage is built 1930. But the house itself is even older. It was built 1800 and something at Dalarna and was moved here in 30 ies. On the terrace I sit now many famous Swedish actors have been eating and drinking wine. The first owner worked in a Theathre. Ernst Rolf, Tuttan Rolf, Karl Gerhard - who knows. Since there are no questbook I have to ask the neighbour.

I couldnt think of any better place to spend my last thrembling hours of vacation. Work starts Monday.

A Lagotto by the Sea

This dog is staying with us for a week. He has already stolen our hearts - just after two days. He is smart, intelligent, fun, amiable but quite bad at obeying. At least while strolling around. But since he only is a year old - not even a teenager - there are chances he will improve. Today we started up to learn him searching for chantarells. It worked fine indoors. But out at the lawn he tried to take the shortcut straight to the candy.

Words from my kid - about the Massacre at Norway

I couldn´t have said it better myself. From my daughter:

AAH I'm burning up while I watch the news... How do you get idea of shooting 14-16 old teenagers at their summer camp??! If you are politically unhappy then what use do you have of massacre of teenagers? Frightfully unnecessary and disgustingly stupid... At these few exceptions death penalties doesn’t sound all that bad.

Judge Persson in the Judgemental Circle - a walk at Pilane burial grounds

The art was there...

The sheep was there...

The kids was there...posing as beautiful as ever....

And the judge was there...

Arbour blogging

I sit at one of my favourite spots in this world - the arbour. I have slept for over ten hours but feel like a wreck. Last days have been great fun but also very exhausting. To clean the house and prepare two parties in one day took som effort. I enjoyed every single minute but regret I didn't have time to catch up with all old friends I hadnt seen for a very long time.

I did prioritize the chats however meaning no time for salsa which I however compensated for Sunday eve. The rain stopped many girls to go outdoors and with the best dancers at Hamburg Salsacongress there was a lack of top level dancers.

Nina's styling classes and Croatian Salsa festival has increased the 'fun factor' in my dance. I slide on the beat, I improvise, I play with the guy and my body language. Increased sensibility, sensuality and fun is the result. A guy broke into laughters when he put himself in front of me doing some styling tricks leaving me with nothing but his back to watch. I thought: "What the heck should I stay here watching his back?". I put my arms around his waste line and started to play the piano on his belly. A six pack belly :)

At the Pool Party - St Andrews Island, Rovinj

The pool party is world famous in the salsa community. Before this year I presumed it was the biggest pool party at northern hemisphere. I doubt now...I think it is the biggest in the world.

While looking at pictures and videos at Youtube you almost get an impression it is an maniac sect or something gathering for doing the rain dance or calling the God's attention. It really looks weired. But all who have been there - and those who knows how salsa dancers are "configured" - knows we are totally sober and use no other drugs than dance itself. But of course it is a kind of mystery....we all surf on the same wave of happiness and joy. I guess it is the same state you can get into while doing really hard training like spinning, or runners high or meditation. You feel mentally connected and share happiness and joy.

Flying all day - home

We never went to bed last night. We presumed it would be harder to sleep just a few hours and then wake up instead of dancing all night and then a quick shower. But at 04:15 we seriously doubted it was the right decision.

At dance floor and classes

I dance but have abstinence at the same time. It is strange how you can go on one 'drug' and missing that other. What I miss now is the possibility to share my happiness at real-time. I hate to confess it but its true. I am addicted in sharing my feeling good moments :)

At the terrace - daytime

 Breakfast at the terrace

The hotel is small but perfect residing just 20 meters from the sea. The staff show an amazing hospitality and care for their guest. For example we have two bikes for free all week. Not to talk about Sergei´s smile when he helped me to break the locker to my bag. We love him!

On the beach

I am on the beach still amazed over being here once again. Last year I got ill very first day. A bad cold I refused to listen to first knocked me down completely at and of week. Not to talk about the following weeks.

There was one good thing however with being ill at a salsafestival - I could record dance. So when I came home I made sure to win the video competition which i did. One week of editing and here I am.

Travelling all day - to Croatia

I thought the travel home would be the most painful. But after 10 hours and still not landed I doubt. My friend is however the best travel company I could get. So we manage.

The Papillons

Sometimes the most extraordinary unexpected meetings takes place. This time at a busstation - Korsvägen - in Göteborg. A small papillon was freezing and searched for warmth between his owners legs. The poor dog was shaking despite the mild summer eve.

I had to ask and I did: "why does he freeze? It IS summer!"
The owner said he just had a shower and we all burst into laughter.

New clothes at Bettina´s Backyard - May in June

It was about time for new "clothes" at this blog

This is my backyard at home office. The cherry tree is magic. But due to a lot of travels this year I almost missed its full blossom. When one business trip was unexpectedly cancelled I brought my camera and shot this picture. You can see a touch if brownish since some of the flowers already are dead. But it had its beauty anyhow.

I love this backyard and I love to follow the season by taking snapshots of it.

The dirt in the foreground are dead cherry blossoms

Another "imagined" syncronosity effect hitting me - grief

Text written 19 May but I decided not to publish then.

Grief is below the surface. Much closer than you think.

I had a happy morning, sunshine, nice plans for the day and the evening. I was happy for having reconnected to an old business contact I hadn´t seen for 10 years. That typical high energy business management consultant that you always have fun with. That type who trained as much as me by that time - perhaps even more - and who loved discussing gym, biking and swimming. That type you could joke about 40-age-crisis when he was telling me he had started up training for Triathlon. That type you always got stuck with in the corridor whenever we happened to meet which wasn´t very often since we had contracts at different sides of town. That type of contact that always made me feel good the short meetings we had.

I smiled sitting there at the bus watching the landscape and the harbour in morning sunshine. I decided to see if he could be found on Twitter. I did a quick search and first post was linkedIn which was already read. Then I saw the second one and I started to sob hysterical even before opening the link. I didn´t manage to read...I tried...but I couldn´t. Not at the bus.

In my secret garden

Small small maple flowers are raining down on tables and chairs

I am still catching up with life. I had three perfect days full of gardening, sunshine, salsa and gym activities. I sit right now in the arbour watching the afternoon sun over the meadows. The Chinese maple is raining faded flowers over me and my cup of coffee. The plants - these ones hung up in a tree to get away from the 'killer snails' - is happy.